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Squabble in The Right Way

Squabble is better to quench at the beginning.

Just say: “Wait, I just recalled …” and after this tell some important stuff about someone from your close circle (let it be even complete baloney – you will work something out later). For example, say that Johnson has final break-up with his girlfriend; or say that mom called and said that her water heater exploded. Or do something unexpected – blow a whistle with two fingers or make a back flip (note: your act must carry nothing offensive or aggressive, for example, do not toss into window her collection of Maureen Dowd writings). Recall some super-urgent business, give her a kiss and leave the room with a promise to be back soon. Before coming back you better call her and make sure that she chilled out.

Be specific.

Never generalize when you are arguing. Statements like “you are always rambling hell knows where”, “it is impossible to find anything in this house” or “all your girlfriends are brainless cows” will be taken as an unjust offense, even if they are true as 2 x 2 = 4. Be specific in your argument. Say instead: “you are three hours late”, “where did you put the bottle opener?” or “I think, Jessica is saying total bullshit” – this will allow you to express your feelings without any offensive generalizations.

Do not rush to deliver last year news.

She knows well even without you, that a year ago she purchased this stupid Tiffany lamp. As well as you already heard before that in 2003 you didn’t send her mom a postcard on Columbus Day. Try to dig out something fresh for your arguments.

Follow the grammar.

Are there just two of you? Then talk about “you” and “me”, and not about abstract “people” or “somebody”. Here are several examples: “This is ridiculous!” that’s bad, “I don’t like that you just said” – that’s good. “Only complete idiot will eat this crap” – bad, “I hate frozen beans” – good. “I am not going to explain anything to anyone!” – bad. “I feel like you don’t want to understand me” – good.

Do not ask “Why?” Because during the argument, when feelings are boiling, you will get the only answer: “Because!” There will go all your talk …

Start your argument immediately.

If you do not like something, say it right away, do not take a week for reflections. The faster will be your reaction, the faster the conflict will be resolved.

Do not play solo.

You’ve said your part? Give her a chance to say hers, who knows, maybe she will say something reasonable. In any case, look into her eyes when she speaks. Women hate talk to stubborn backs and sarcastic profiles. Men, actually, do too.

Each one should get a glass of some cold drink.

Not for pouring the contents into each other’s faces, but for taking breaks in the quarrel and chilling out. Just in case, you better use plastic cups.

 

Woman Qualities that Any Man Would be Attracted To

Confidence

You don’t have to be the most beautiful women in town to be confident. All that is needed is the belief that you are worth his efforts. Don’t make the mistake of praising yourself in front of him. It would be more interesting for him to discover the qualities in you by himself. And he would appreciate them more when he finds them without you informing him. And the more he discovers the more would he want you to share them with him.

Trust

This is something that men rate very high when you ask what men want from women. They don’t like their woman to be suspicious about them all the time. They would rather have a woman who would believe in their words. A man would be very happy with a woman who trusts her man and doesn’t think he cheats on her. A nagging woman or one that is always asking questions about his activities and friends would put the man off.

Kindness

This is important for men but beware. Do not fake it. If you act being kind just to impress the man you should know that the truth would come out sooner or later. It is very good to be kind to the man but even better if you appreciate and compliment the waiters in the restaurant or thank the cab driver when you are with him. But it should be genuine. The best you can do is to make it a habit this will not only get you good response from your man but also from every one around you. Kindness is not only what men want from women but what everyone wants from everyone.

Commitment

If you find the man to be the one for you it is better to not express your desire to be committed immediately. Give him time to be sure about his feelings. If you jump the gun it would only scare him away. Always try and not think too far ahead in terms of commitment. Considering what do men want from women in terms of commitment is basically time to make a decision. It usually is not about whether to get committed to you but when to get committed to you. Men take a little more time than women when deciding about commitment.

 

Know the Reason Why You Need To Move On

What does moving on really mean? It does not mean you are giving up on the chance to get a second chance, it means you are showing yourself, your ex, friends, family and the world that you can live without your ex beside you. However, the problem that people are facing is distinguishing the difference between the two. This keeps people from doing the best thing for themselves and their ex after the breakup.

If you move on, you not only help yourself deal with the breakup aftermath but you can fully assess the feelings for your ex, your life and how they come together and mesh. If your ex sees you moving on and getting on with life without them, the chances of him or her feeling the same way are great. If you look as if the breakup meant nothing, they’ll certainly feel as if they never should have been without you in the first place.

You don’t have to feel like you are moving on, but don’t force it either. Show the strength that you feel like you don’t have to everyone else; to those who are close to you including your ex and your close circle of family and friends. Showing it makes you look more eye-catching. They may begin to treat you better than ever and your ex may wonder why he or she broke up with you.

How can you put up a front that you’ve moved on especially if you don’t feel like it? There’re 2 ways you can do this.

(1) Take care of your appearance – Change your appearance to look better. Buy clothes that flatter your looks. If you need it, start a diet and get some exercise. Lose those unwanted pounds that seem to trip you up. You can also get a haircut or a brand new hair style. If you don’t like to smile because of an imperfection, then gets something done about it. There are so many things that you can change about yourself. Pick out a few that you think you need to change first.

(2) Get a social life – Don’t let the breakup pain stop you from living your life. You don’t want it to completely take over your life. You may not want to live life without them but you need to show them that you can. Go out with your friends. Surround yourself with people who can give you a healthy outlet. If you force yourself to have a good time, you may find yourself having a good time on your own without having to force it.

If you combine these two things together, you’ll find yourselves beating off other people who would like to know who you are. Do you have to go out with them? No, you don’t. The interest alone that you’ll get will help you feel confident and good in yourself.

If you act like you’re moving on, you’ll find yourself wondering if you really want to get your ex back or if you want to move on and find someone else you want to be with. If you can show him or her how you are now, it may make them take a second glance and want to have a second chance. Try it, it works!

 

20 Facts You Didn’t Know About Hugh Hefner

Hugh Marston Hefner, famous American businessman, magazine publisher and playboy, passed away at his home, the Playboy Mansion, in the Holmby Hills area of Los Angeles, on September 27 at the age of 91 of natural causes. Hefner was born in 1926.

He was the editor-in-chief of Playboy magazine and the chief creative officer of Playboy Enterprises, the publishing group that operates the magazine. Here are 20 facts you need to know about Hefner:

  1. Hefner married his 1st wife, Mildred Williams, in 1949. She was his college sweetheart and 1st sexual experience. Williams was engaged in an affair during his time in the Army. Hefner described that as the most devastation moment in his life. They divorced in 1959. Hefner and Williams had 2 children together, Christie Hefner and David Hefner.
  2. In 1988, Hefner named his oldest daughter, Christie Hefner, as CEO and chairperson of Playboy Enterprises, Inc. She served as CEO and chairperson from 1988 – 2008.
  3. After Hefner had served in the Army, attended college and worked for several years in the magazine publishing industry, he became sure that there was a market for an upscale men’s magazine. He put up his furniture as collateral for a loan and borrowed the rest from family and friends.
  4. Hefner published Playboy’s very 1st issue at his kitchen table in Chicago in December of 1953.
  5. The 1st message on the magazine announced: “We don’t expect to solve any world problems or prove any great moral truths.”
  6. Playboy magazine was an instant sensation. There was no date on the cover in case there wasn’t a 2nd
  7. Playboy magazine is now published in more than 20 countries.
  8. Playboy was the 1st adult magazine to be produced in braille.
  9. In 1989, he married his 2nd wife, Kimberley Conrad. They divorced in 2010. The couple had 2 children, Cooper Hefner and Marston Hefner.
  10. Hefner married again, in 2012, to Crystal Harris.
  11. Hefner was compared to Jay Gatsby, Citizen Kane, and Walt Disney, but he was his own production.
  12. In the fall of 2015, it was announced that Playboy, starting in March 2016, won’t include full frontal nudity anymore. Curve of a backside, yes. Bare breasts, no.
  13. In 2016, Hefner handed over creative control of Playboy to his son Cooper Hefner.
  14. In 2010, he donated the final $900.000 needed to preserve 138 acres behind the Hollywood sign on Mount Lee.
  15. Hefner holds the Guinness World Record for the longest-serving Editor-in-Chief of a magazine.
  16. He was against drugs. He banned them from the house and fired any girl who used them.
  17. The Playboy Mansion is among the few private residences in the US to have a zoo license.
  18. Hefner is the 9th cousin to President George Bush.
  19. He personally interviewed every single “Girl of the Month.”
  20. In summer 2016, Hefner sold his Playboy Mansion. Hostess Brands heir Daren Metropoulos bought the Holmby Hills estate for $100 million and agreed to the stipulation that Hefner could live there for the rest of his life.

The adult industry is classified as high risk. To get approved for low-cost and secure adult merchant processing, adult merchants should turn only to a reputable payment processor in the field.

Author Bio: Electronic payments expert, Blair Thomas, co-founded eMerchantBroker in 2010. His passions include writing/producing music, and camping.  eMerchantBroker is America’s No. 1 adult merchant processing company, serving both traditional and high-risk merchants.

 

Tips to Getting Back Your Ex

Cutting off All Contact

Many people think that showering their ex with affection and attention is the way to win back their heart. This is so wrong. Actually you need to break off the contact for a period of a month. Give him or her some room to deal with everything going on in their life. They need some time to miss you which also gives you time to focus on you.

Don’t Sit Around

The worst thing you can do is lay about. Instead get up and take some action. If you want your ex back, you can’t do it from your couch. You have to fix the issues that plagued your relationship and the couch isn’t made for fixing your problems. Only you can do this.

Seek Out Loved Ones

Get together with people who care about you whether this is your family or your friends or even both. Spend as much time with them as you can. Their support can build up your emotional needs and give you power to face what has just occurred. You don’t want to turn to them for all your depressing needs. People can only take so much misery.

Fix Your Appearance

Try to remember that life does go on. For that reason, look your best as often as you can. Don’t sit idly by watching life go on without you. Think about the things you can do for yourself that can make you feel better. If that means getting a new hairdo, do it. Once, you have done this… get out there and party even if you don’t feel like it. The attention you get from others can help boost your own confidence and self worth. It may even spark some jealousy in your ex if he or she sees you acting happy.

Change Your Attitude

Only you, not your ex, can change what you find wrong inside. If you have to change your personality to win him or her back, then do it. Remember that if nothing has been changed, your relationship is unlikely to work out the second go around. These changes will need to be permanent too.

Work on Your Relationship

Even if you got that second chance you wanted, you have to work on your relationship to see it through. Those things that plagued the relationship the first go will have to be gone the second time around. While most issues can be seen, others are still hidden. You and your ex will have to support one another to get back together if you want to make the second chance to work.

 

Unhealthy Relationship Signs

The same goes for some relationships. We have all heard the stories or known someone who enjoyed dating the wild woman or the bad boy. The great actor Rod Steiger told the story about how when he was in the Navy, he and a buddy would play a game with the ladies in the clubs. Steiger would walk up to a woman point to his buddy standing at the bar and warn her not to mess with that guy because he was dangerous. He said not more than five minutes later the woman would be dancing with his buddy. Apparently Steiger’s friend also returned the favor.

That’s all well and good but right now you have got a decision to make. The person you are currently dating has a temper. We are not talking a little irritation now and then. No it’s the real deal and when they lose it, look out.

To be fair they have never directed it towards you. Any arguments or disagreements they have handled pretty well. In fact it was you who on occasion got more upset than they did. Nothing off the charts but your dating partner wound up being the calm one.

But you have seen them go. You always told yourself that their anger was justified. That is possible but it is hard to rationalize out of control anger. Sure they calm down and apologize (sometimes) but the truth is you are living in the middle of a storm. There are a couple of things to look for.

1. Frequency

Is it one of those once in a blue moon deals or does it happen more often than you want to admit to yourself?

2. Intensity

Does it come out in the form of verbal abuse or do they get physical. Physical does not necessarily mean you have to stop them from getting into a fight. It could mean slamming doors, kicking walls or throwing objects at no one in particular. When they do go off is it a combination of physical and verbal?

3. How Long

Their anger may be like one of those summer storms: quick, intense and then it’s over. Or it could be one that takes awhile to subside. Naturally you want it to be over with as soon as possible but either one can be scary.

4. The Aftermath

Do they get apologetic or do they sit and stew about what just happened. They are not so much thinking what they did wrong as how they were wronged. You also have to keep your eye on the way they apologize. Sometimes it’s more defensive than sincere.

Everybody blows their cool now and then. It’s part of being human. However exploding into a rage on a regular basis is cause for concern. You may like your dating partner but watching them go over the edge once too often may be giving you more danger than you really want to bargain for.

 

Tips to Find the Right Partner to Get Married

One can take the opportunity of courtship period to determine if the prospective life partner is right for you or not. Be it online matrimony or marriage arranged through an acquaintance, it is absolutely essential to establish the compatibility between the would-be bride and the groom.

Compatibility does not mean how much you have in common. In fact, at times people with polar attitudes and extremely opposite likes and dislikes make very happily married couples. Compatibility in matrimony suggests how much you can remain in harmony despite being as different as you are. Respecting each other and how the other person make you feel in different situations should be taken into consideration before taking the final plunge into a matrimonial relationship.

Sometimes, it is easier to know what you don’t want in a matrimonial relationship that what you want. For example, one can easily say that one doesn’t want to marry someone who drinks too much, uses drugs, indulges in illegal behaviour, or is unfaithful, irresponsible, or dishonest. But it Is not easy to say what one really wants and what will make marriage a truly happy lifetime experience.

Don’t jump into a decision before giving it considerable thought and evaluating all aspects of the situation. Marriage does not just mean filling a void, it means spending your whole life with someone worthwhile and the one who makes you feel great. Matrimonials generally talk about the clich�d attributes of a person. However, the real success of marriage depends on what lies behind those words.

While physical attraction is a must, it should not become a blinding factor or the most overriding factor. It must be remembered that physical attraction subsides very quickly while what remains is the real persona of the person in a matrimonial relationship. Open communication, sense of humour, respect for each other, giving each other space is what really matters in marriage. These are the factors that make a marriage last.

Having said this, it is also true that some degree of attraction is must for a relationship to last. If you do not find the person attractive at all, it would be foolish to force it. Don’t take a hasty decision and try to find out more about the person. It is important to know how he/she handles a crisis situation or how the person behaves with you after you do a mistake to establish how your matrimonial relationship will look like. Some people even advise that it should be observed how a girl behaves with her dad and a boy behaves with his mother to have an idea of how he/she will behave with you in life.

If you start feeling that there can be sustainable trust, confidence in each other and respect as life partners, then you are on the right track to find the right person to get married to. Only such a person can bring emotional sustainability and personal strength to your life. Obviously, the right person would never let you down or make you feel negative, embarrassed or disrespected. It is not necessary to agree to everything with each other but it is important to respectfully agree to disagree. The right person will give you your space, give you the liberty to take decisions, encourage you to be in control of your life. Once you can establish that these are the things your partner I swilling to offer you in matrimony, you can be sure you have found the right person.

While all these are personality traits, it is also important to find out that the person you are marrying is considerate and agreeable to what you want and desire when it comes to sex and affection. Sexual compatibility is as important to marital happiness as any other thing.

Once you are sure about all the things and decide to get married, be ready to nurture your relationship with love and care. There will always be difficulties in the matrimonial path but that should not deter you from looking at the overall goodness of your relationship. Finding the right person is important but equally important is developing the right attitude to sustain a healthy and successful matrimonial relationship.

 

Important Things that Man Looks for in A Woman

Understand Weakness in Men

Men from the childhood are told to suppress their feelings, they are not allowed to express their emotions, which for a man is a sign of weakness and on the contrary women are more expressive. When in a relationship the effect of this is manifold. Women expect the men to express their love as they do. Men can’t respond in the same way, but it does not mean that his love is any less. It’s just a question of expression; men show their love they don’t like to speak about it. Men show it in their actions by doing things that he thinks would make her happy. In learning how to make him love you more, the first thing is to respect the love he shows, not try to bull doze him into saying it. It acts as a huge turn off.

Cater to His Needs

Women often feel that a little less frequent intimacy acts as a catalyst to reignite passions. This is seldom true. Men like to be close and intimate with woman that he loves. If the woman does not respond he is hurt. He feels rejected and would love you less for it. He has his needs which you have to satisfy and this would make him happier and is one of the best answers how you can make a man love you. One of the best ways to make him love you more is to be more passionate with him and allow him to do some tasks for you. A man needs to feel wanted and he likes making his partner happy, it massages his ego. So go ahead and give him the chance to prove that he is the best man in world.

Don’t Criticized Him

Men like to be told that they are good and the best, he wants to be of value and it matters to him that among all, you value him. Always listen to his words and make him feel important.

Women have a tendency to be too open about their feelings, women want to be listened. Men need a bit of mystery in the women they love. It keeps him on his toes, so be mysterious and don’t try to submerge him with talks about how you feel. Take your time off and be sure about yourself. Bring issues that are important but don’t discuss unimportant things every time.

Men respect woman who know their feelings and who are comfortable with themselves. If you still want to know how to make him love you more, then be yourself, be a bit mysterious and respect and value him.

 

Find Out Time To End Relationship

Sometimes when a dating relationship heads south it’s really just a matter of giving each other space to recharge your batteries and come back to each other with a fresh perspective. At other times? It’s a clear indicator that the relationship is headed for a breakup.

There’s really nothing in this life that is set in stone and relationships are the least of them. One day it is lovey-dovey with vows of endless love; the next day it’s war. Still you are not sure if you are headed for a break up or even want one but something is happening and you have to ask yourself some questions.

1. Passing Through?

Many a relationships whether dating or married go through a phase where it seems like each person cannot stand to be in the others company. It can last a few hours, days or even longer but the couple does manage to pull out of it and come back together stronger than before. Are you and your significant other in that phase? If yes how long has it been? A month or more without any let up is not a good sign.

2. Indifference

Where as before so many things your dating partner said or did peaked your interest. They either made you laugh, excited or curious but whatever your reaction they had your attention. Now the most you can muster is apathy. Is it happening all the time or just every now and then?

3. Communication

Has it gotten to the point where you don’t want to respond? Maybe you do want to communicate but you and your dating partner are on different wavelengths. As far as you can recall that has never happened before; at least not for extended periods of time. Does the sound of their voice sound like fingernails scraped across the blackboard?

With all the things currently going on in the world, it may be outside forces that are causing much of the tension in your dating relationship. You may want to examine if that possibility exists.

 

Common Mistakes you Should Avoid Doing Right after The Break Up

# Stop Stressing Yourself

It’s not hard to stress over the things you can’t help. However, all you are doing is adding those wrinkle worry lines to your face and driving people close to you nuts. If you really want to get your ex back, you’ll have to push aside how you really feel and start dealing with it. Be sure to get motivated about getting him or her back. You should already know that time isn’t going to fix the issue; you are going to have to deal with it yourself.

# Fall Back Into the Routine

If you and your ex want to make another go of the relationship, don’t act like everything is good. If you pick up from where you left off, you still have the problems that plagued you both the first time around. Saying sorry isn’t going to fix all your issues. If getting your ex back is what you really want then you better put a ton of effort into making the relationship work.

# Don’t Purse If Your Ex Moves On

It’s not hard to see that as time passes the further and further away your chances become to get your ex back. If it looks like he or she has moved on without you, walk away. Don’t purse them because it makes you look like a psycho and you could be charged with stalking. If your ex recently got married or will be getting married, it’s a sign that you need to stop trying to bring you two back together. Yes, it may hurt. However, not everyone is meant to be. You have to accept that life does continue without them in your life.

# Don’t be Aggressive

Sometimes a little aggressiveness is a good trait. However, after you have broken up, being aggressive just add stress to you and your ex’s plate. If you want to get your ex back, do it smoothly and gently. Don’t speak about feelings or show attention all the time. Why? This only acerbates the feeling of uneasy and aggressiveness.

# Make Your Own Changes

Understand that a breakup is a two way street. Look to yourself to find out what you did wrong in the relationship. If you do make changes, keep yourself in check. If you are getting back together or have gotten back together, the last thing you want to do is revert back to your old self. Doing this is kind of like lying and the chances of a breakup occurring again are possible.